Reflection 5: Rowing in the Same Direction

When we talk about building a domestic church, it starts long before routines or family traditions. It starts with our foundation. First, each of us has to devote our life to Christ. Then we devote ourselves to each other. In the sacrament of matrimony, we were called to be one. That means we are in this together through thick and thin.

At our wedding, my grandma gave us a small canoe with a note attached. In short she said marriage is like a canoe crossing the ocean of life. We each have an oar. If we row in different directions, we just spin in circles. But if we row together and let the wind of the Holy Spirit guide us, we will move forward. There will be storms and rough waters, but if we stay in sync, nothing can truly divide us.

That image has stuck with me, especially in the last three years. We have already faced some rough seasons. Life gets busy. Work, kids, lack of sleep, stress. It does not take much for our rhythm to get off. When that happens, it feels like the canoe starts rocking.

In those moments, I try to remind myself of my role as a husband. I am called to be self sacrificing. Not defensive. Not prideful. Self sacrificing. When I focus on loving my wife well and staying rooted in Christ, it steadies the boat. She might still be having a hard day. I might be too. But someone has to choose calm. Someone has to choose grace.

The waves come and go. Over the past six months, since welcoming our daughter, we have been in a season of change and unknown. It has not been easy. There have been moments of temptation, frustration, and sin on both sides. But we show up. We apologize. We go to confession. We return to a state of grace with Christ and with each other.

That is what building the foundation of a domestic church looks like for us. Two imperfect people, rowing in the same direction, trusting that God is guiding the wind.

Prayer:
Lord, help us to row together in unity. Teach us to be humble, quick to forgive, and rooted in You. Guide our marriage through calm waters and storms alike. Amen.

See you in the Eucharist.